Cold Mountain Blog

Home Blog erstellt am: : 29/08/07 Zuletzt aktualisiert : 17/10/11 21:46 / 38 veröffentlichte Einträge

Blog, the Thirtyfirst Verfasst: Freitag, den 08. August 2008 11:10

Ooaahh. Back at work today after spending Wednesday night leaking out of both ends. I never knew I had so much fluid in me! Hopefully the rest of the family won't get it; we're supposed to be heading to France tomorrow for 2 weeks' camping. That would NOT be fun.

Anyway, after having taken yesterday off, I figured that my chances of having a restful day today were better at work than at home. We've got houseguest at the moment which means that we've got 5 under-10-year-olds in the house. Lovely as they are, on a rainy day like today I fancy my chances here better ;).

All for now, back in 2 weeks.

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Blog, the Thirtieth Verfasst: Dienstag, den 05. August 2008 10:58

Whoops. I've been slipping. Badly. Five whole months with no entry. Not good - or maybe it is. Maybe it's a sign that I've felt less need to express myself because things have been going well. Who knows how these things work...

What's happend in the meantime? Well, I turned 40, bought a huge tropical fish tank, went back to the UK for a long weekend, had some great hikes with the family, the kids finished their first year of primary school with excellent reports, I started a flickr account (www.flickr.com/photos /cold_mountain_photography/) and am about to go on summer holiday to France (Chamonix and Côte D'Azur). Five months in a nutshell...

Highlight was definitely the hiking trips with the kids, particularly a weekend hike in the Rofan staying overnight in the Bayreuther Hütte. On the Sunday we climbed around 930 m over some fairly serious mountains, saw marmots up close, took some great photos (IMHO) and rode down in a single-seater chair lift. My back is holding up nicely, which bodes well for some serious trips in Chamonix.

The garden has seen some serious re-vamping too with a new rhodedendron border and a pond. We spend ridiculous amounts of dosh on plants, which have yet to get established. Fortunately July was extremely wet and so most things seem to have taken well.

I'd better get some work done. I'll try to get back after the break and blog more often.

BFN

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Soundtrack of our Lives Verfasst: Mittwoch, den 19. März 2008 14:44

von Frau Argh über Endzone...
1. Öffne deinen Musicplayer (iTunes, Winamp, Media Player, iPod etc.)
2. Stelle es auf Shuffle/ Random
3. Drücke “Play”
4. Schreibe für jede Antwort den Songtitel, der gerade gespielt wird, auf:
5. Drücke für jede neue Frage den “next” Button.

Vorspann: "Da Doo Ron Ron" - The Crystals (don't ask! - it's on the Quadrophenia sound track)
Aufwachen: "Ride the River" - Eric Clapton & JJ Cale (actually should be Van Halen: "Jump")
Erster Schultag: "All By Myself" - Green Day

Verlieben: "Touch Me" - The Doors
Das erste Mal: "Hard Liner" - Jethro Tull
Kampflied: "The River" - The Beautiful South (not at all suitable)
Schluss machen: "Street of Dreams" - Rainbow (can I swap the last two?)

Abschlussball: "Ready and Willing" - Whitesnake
Leben: "Heart of the Darklands" - Rhapsody Of Fire
Nervenzusammenbruch: "Take it Back" - Pink Floyd (Volltreffer)
Autofahren: "?" - Nena (völlig daneben)

Flashback: "The Way Life's Meant To Be" - ELO
Wieder zusammenkommen: "Anthem" - Rush (can I drive to this one please?)
Hochzeit: "Mambo" - Herbert Grönemeyer (LOL)
Geburt des ersten Kindes: "Feelin' Alright" - Joe Cocker (except I wasn't)
Endkampf: "She" - Green Day

Todesszene: "The Letter" - Joe Cocker
Beerdigungslied: "Closer To The Heart" - Rush (cool!)
Abspann: "Tempus Fugit" - Yes (ditto)

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Blog, The Twentyninth Verfasst: Mittwoch, den 27. Februar 2008 11:07

It's been a while again... In the meantime I've spoken with my neurologist and reduced the prozac dose with the

result that my thoughts are no longer getting away from me. I'm able to function at work and things are going well.

The kids have had their interim reports from school - the dreaded "Zwischenzeugnisse", in which they both did well. You have to read between the lines a little bit, for example "Rhiannon has a 'fantasy-full' manner of communicating" may indicate that she's not 100% accurate in her representations. "Joshua keeps to the agreed rules most of the time" indicates that most of the time is not all of the time.

On the down side, my new PC has had to go back to the shop - won't boot. I've got no idea whether it's something I did, hardware related or a result of the data transfer from the old PC. At least that is working reliably, allowing me some distraction in the evenings in the form of Carcasonne online or other diversions.

I'll get back once more is going on...

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Blog, The Twentyeighth Verfasst: Mittwoch, den 13. Februar 2008 10:00

Today is not a good day. I feel like a foetal-shaped spring that's out of shape and wants to snap back to its original form. I suffer from seasonal affective disorder or winter depression. Two weeks ago I started taking fluoxetin (aka prozac) to combat the symptoms. Last week I was on vacation in the sun and snow and could more or less manage. This week I'm back at work and fighting my demons. I've got a pile of rejected decisions on my table that I need to deal with because they're hanging over my head, but can't deal with because they're too painful to cope with.

I had to steel myself to leave the house yesterday and this morning. Hugs with the kids before they left for school kept me going for a while. Reading my book on the train helped take my mind of things for a bit. Now I'm sitting in front of my PC and can't bring myself to work.

To top it off, I think I re-injured my back a little last week and my right foot is tingling from pressure on the sciatic nerve. Normally I don't fall much whilst cross-country skiing, but I took four quite hard tumbles on Thursday as we skied in fresh snow and I jarred myself a bit.

This year the depression is easier to deal with because I can minimise the guilt. I know it's not just 'all in the mind', but that it's something that's happening to me. The past three years I've felt like crap between Christmas and Easter and never understood why. Last year my wife suggested that there might be a recurring pattern and got me to go to a neurologist, who confirmed that it was very likely that it was SAD.

There are glimmers in the darkness. My wife had an interview yesterday for a job here in the office that went well. Skiing was good and the kids did well in their respective ski schools and had fun. The weather is good at the moment - sunny but cold. Plenty of light.

I don't need sympathy. I'm not writing this to provoke a wave of 'aah - poor lad!' responses. Understanding would by good. Solidarity. Acceptance. Reassurance.

Hoping that you're doing better...

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